Shaken, not stirred

trisarahdactyl:

michaelceratops:

osointricate:

I wonder what President Lincoln would think about there being a movie about him killing vampires. 

“whats a movie”

#’fuck you im not going into another theater’

(via laughingnancy)

baby-pigeon-in-the-trench-coat:

spainstateofmind:

thebadwolf:

Fun party trick: put Skittles and M&M’s in the same bowl, wait for someone to grab a handful.

you can go fuck yourself

my mum did this and didnt tell anyone so when my sister put a bunch in her mouth she spat them out and started crying and now she has trust issues 

(via heyfunniest)

thatfunnyblog:

KATE MIDDLETON’S BABY WILL BE THE HALF BLOOD PRINCE AND IF THAT ISN’T THE GREATEST NEWS YOU’VE HEARD TODAY THEN YOU CAN GET OUT OF MY FACE.

(Source: i-deny-this-reality, via heyfunniest)

letslikemakememories:

watchtheskytonight:

satan-official:

thearchangeltrickster:

bandannarama:

iamtonysexual:

biptch:

don’t make me snap my fingers in a z formation 

hip rotation 

booty sensation 

ＥＴＥＲＮＡＬ ＤＡＭＮＡＴＩＯＮ

*snaps fingers in a pentagram formation*

*says a Latin incantation*

waits for lucifer with anticipation

your waiting is over my friends

ALL HAIL THE LORD SATAN

what the fuck is wrong with this website

(Source: basedmadoka, via deanshuggybear)

sarlaccvagina:

petition for Avengers 2 to end on a freeze-frame like this

(via heyfunniest)